October 24, 2009


When I was 12 or 13, I could never leave home without my hoodie. Wearing a hooded jacket was such a huge trend during those early 2000 days, but I had my own personal reason for being unable to part with it.

I fear that whenever I go out I might accidentally meet my father. And when I do, i just had to hide my face and run as far as I can. And I was not being paranoid. It did happen once or twice.

Don't ask me how I hate living in fear, especially if it was of your very own parents. I hate it, so so much. More than any KoRn's hit songs could ever describe.

But, shoot, years go by and when I thought I could finally live my life free of fear and anger, this person showed up in my life.

Never before I became so enraged at his selfish, sadistic, stupid, out of date ways of living and thinking. Knowing how he always backstabbed me and how he once hit my mother and my sister, and is always so cruel with the pets, geez, I think it is just natural if I began to think that if I spend too many times being home alone with him, I might end up as one of those dead bodies flowing at Kalimalang.

Call it being paranoid. But if you never had what I had before, if you never got to life with Fear, then shut up. I do not need your clueless comments.

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